(no subject)

[oyceter]

ginmar's last few posts in general make me feel very queasy and very angry that I am female. I hate that I have to think about this, that I worry about walking outside when it's dark and I'm alone but my boyfriend doesn't. I hate that people I knew at college laughed at the Take Back the Night marches and thought they were unnecessary and quoted the same kinds of statistics on male rape or females lying about being raped (ala Disclosure, stupid ass book). I hate that I feel nidgy and frightened whenever a strange man talks to me, even if he's just being friendly. I hate that I feel almost physically threatened when men invade my personal space. I also hate that my mom tells stories of people being raped to make sure I am more careful, that my sister sometimes blames unwelcome attention from guys on herself being "too friendly." I hate that when she does that, my mom substantiates it and says my sister should be more careful who she smiles to, because people could get the wrong impression.

I hate that this fear has power over my life just because I am female.

Comments

[oyceter]

I know! What pisses me off the most is that I showed one of the links to my boyfriend, and the first thing he could think of was, what if they passed really strict laws about enforcing sexual harrassment and it was abused by women crying wolf!

ARGH.

People who don't believe "no means no" are very frightening.

Mostly I am annoyed because the general assumption (at least at Princeton) was that women's issues were, well, women's issues, which is incredibly insulting. I keep trying to let my bf know that it is not just an "issue" because it affects everyone personally. I bet most of the people at college thought they were reasonable and enlightened, and I personally think everyone was in serious denial over the amount of date rape that was happening there because of the eating club atmosphere and the entire drinking problem.

It just pisses me off, because I was in a situation like that, and no one said anything. No one even acknowledged that it was date rape, except one of my roommates, two years later, after attending a Take Back the Night march.

I think I should start walking around everywhere with my kendo stick, heh.