Sakura of DOOM

(I do mean to answer comments, particularly in the intl. race post, but I am a bit behind on things now, and I have to type this up so I can return the book and not be fined.)

I went and ILLed this after seeing Tatum quote from it in Can We Talk About Race?. I'm very glad I did.

It's hard to talk about this book without talking about where I personally am because my reaction to the book is so very visceral. ( Personal musings )

So when I read this book, I was looking for advice, I was looking for models, I was looking for people struggling with similar questions and for people further down the path than I am. And I found that.

The book covers a variety of experiences: Emily Bernard's assertion that sometimes she needs compassion more than awareness about Racism 101, David Mura detailing his evolution from someone who wanted to be white to an anti-racist and how that broke old friendships and formed new ones, Darryl Pinckney's experience of being black and having Jewish friends and attempting to navigate that space, Somini Sengupta talking about race and nationality and how it came up between her and her black lover.

I was a little put off at first because the first few essays in the book deal more with POC-white interracial friendships, from both POC and white points of view. But later essays explore POC-POC interracial friendships, and on a whole, the essays dealt with a huge range. I particularly liked that individual essays looked at intersections of class and nationality and ethnicity as well as intersections of race and how all those factors complicate readings of race. Alas, there weren't any that covered differences of sexuality, gender, age, or abledness, and I think all of the friendships are American ones. I also liked that the essays covered a wide range of reactions, from people who valued friends who weren't necessarily anti-racist to those who had to deal with hate and anger directed toward themselves to those who were dealing with their anger and hate of white people to those who had largely decided not to have white friends at all. I like that there are no judgments.

Here are the ones that I found most useful personally:

I loved Somini Sengupta's essay on being Indian (and an Indian citizen living in the US) and how issues of nationality complicated her relationship with a black man. ( more )

But the one that affected me most, the one that I keep going back to, is David Mura's "Secret Colors," the same essay that Tatum quotes from in her book. ( more )

I am guessing that not everyone will be as moved by the essays I am moved by: different essays will speak to different people, depending on where they are and who they are. Still, there is such a range here that I think most people will be able to find something, and I found almost all of them to be illuminating even if my reaction was less personal and more intellectual.

In case you couldn't tell, this is highly, highly recommended.