Meyer, Stephenie - Twilight

[oyceter]

It was really odd reading this, because I had heard rilina rant about it a lot, but my sister was reccing it to me (and nearby while I was reading it).

I think I would have really loved it, had I read it a few years earlier, before I got sick of the entire vampire sub-genre, particularly the entire YA vampire sub-sub-genre.

Bella has moved from sunny Arizona to rainy Forks to stay with her dad instead of her mom, who's off being married. She starts noticing the strange Cullen family at school, particularly Edward Cullen, who is gorgeous and sends conflicting signals. They fall in love! It's too bad, since I think the book would have been about ten times more interesting if they fought crime instead.

Several elements of the book made me think that it would work much better as shoujo manga: a) Bella is clumsy and klutzy beyond belief, yet spunky, b) every other guy in the school miraculously has a crush on her and she doesn't realize, c) Edward is supernaturally gorgeous, and d) Bella's smell is irresistible to Edward.

As a benchmark to see if you will like this or not, if you haven't already fled at the shoujo manga description: Bella describes Forks as literally being hell on earth for her, despite the absence of pitchforks, flame, or anything else; Edward is introduced as having bronze hair.

The thing is, I can totally see why the book is a best-seller and loved by girls everywhere. It's got the same formula that's in Sailor Moon, every series by Watase Yuu, and most romance novels: clumsy, normal girl is pursued by a preternaturally handsome, dangerous guy who dramatically rescues her from situations despite her brief attempts to show her independence. Granted, Watase Yuu's guys are generally less dangerous than most, and most shoujo manga doesn't even have the brief attempts at independence. And the romances tend to lovingly describe every gorgeous detail of the guys, whereas manga lingers over them in two-page spreads. But in the end, it's largely the same wish-fulfillment fantasy.

And, in general, I am a fan of female wish-fulfillment fantasies. I just think I have read too many of this sort, and so, my buttons have shifted enough that this didn't grab them. I would also snark mercilessly at it, except my sister likes the book and recced it, and because this is so the thing I would have loved way back when I was reading LJ Smith.

Also, (minor spoiler!) in this world, vampires sparkle like diamonds in sunshine.

sorry, totally could not resist. but really! they sparkle! LITERALLY!

ETA: And why is it that hundred-year-old vampires are always attracted to teenagers? I don't understand! And why is it that hundred-year-old vampires still act like mooning teenagers as well?

Links:
- buymeaclue's review
- habiliments' review
- sophia_helix's review

Comments

[littlebutfierce]

I haaated this book, & I'm still in the throes of a vampire phase. I definitely like cheesy vampire stuff, but this was not my kind of cheese. I dunno... I really hate teen romances that feel fake--like "I love you!" & you don't feel like they've even gotten to know each other to that point--& that was totally how Bella & Edward felt to me. Also, I hated how ethereally & classically beautiful everyone seemed to be (in a white way, of course). Yawn.

I've heard the sequel has a badly written Native American guy in it, & is as cringeworthy (@ least wrt what made me hate the first one).

[oyceter]

Yes! The "you are my life!" "never leave me!" stuff really annoyed me. And I forgot to note just how annoyed I was that they made a huge point of Bella being so white and pale that she stood out and the random mystical and mysterious Native Americans.

[telophase.livejournal.com]

Vampires are obviously stuck at the emotional maturity level of teenagers. Which means that if you fall for one and don't go vamp yourself, in five, ten, twenty years, you'll be ready to settle down and start paying a mortgage, and he'll be all wanting to go to concerts and go cruising and maybe go off to South Padre at spring break and drink lots of really cheap beer.

[oyceter]

See, someone needs to write that. Or someone needs to write a vampire love story in which the vampire falls for an eighty-year-old woman because of the life experience or something.

[desdenova.livejournal.com]

vampires sparkle like diamonds in sunshine.

!!!

I would totally run out and buy this if it was a shojo manga instead of a YA novel.

(Why is this sort of thing more acceptable in manga form? I don't know. Possibly 'cause of pretty drawings of preternaturally beautiful and sparkling vampires.)

[oyceter]

I know! I nearly burst into hysterical laughter at that point.

(Why is this sort of thing more acceptable in manga form? I don't know. Possibly 'cause of pretty drawings of preternaturally beautiful and sparkling vampires.)

I have no idea! I agree; I suspect some of it is having eye candy to ogle at, as opposed to having to wade through bad prose about bronze hair and topaz eyes that change colors to onyx (so not making that up). And chibis. Chibis make everything better.

[rayechu.livejournal.com]

That was my exact thought as well!

[katie-m.livejournal.com]

Wait, why are hundred-year-old vampires in high school at all? I mean, after the twentieth time you repeat your senior year, isn't someone going to notice?

[oyceter]

Well, like most vampire YA books, they explain it by having them move to different areas every so often so presumably people don't remember. Of course, this doesn't address things like paperwork, but I think most of the books handwave and say vampires are master paperwork forgers.

What I don't get is why a hundred-year-old vampire would ever want to go through high school repeatedly. I can see the first few times for the novelty, but after that?

[rilina.livejournal.com]

You know, somehow I had managed to forget about the sparkling.

[oyceter]

You DIDN'T! That is too funny!!

I feel the sparkling adds a whole new level.

[tatterpunk.livejournal.com]

I would also snark mercilessly at it, except my sister likes the book and recced it, and because this is so the thing I would have loved way back when I was reading LJ Smith.

I'm probably unfairly biased because LJS was my intro to trashy vamp literature, way back when, but I felt that she (or most her books, at least) had a redeeming sense of snark and self-awareness that Twilight, while harmless fun, was completely and totally lacking.

I mean, seriously. Sparkling vampires? Bella? Meyers is pretty shameless with her wish-fulfillment, and normally I like that, but... actually, my main problem was with the narrative drive that seemed to screech to a half 2/3rds of the way through. Like Meyers honestly wasn't sure what to do with her lovebirds once they were in each other's arms.

[oyceter]

Dude, LJS was totally my intro too. Though I'm still pissed off about the ending for Forbidden Game. I think she started off not being quite as snarky (at least, from what I remember of the Vampire Diaries, what with the absolutely beautiful blonde Elena who had two vampire brothers swooning for her). I think I like her Night World books best, except the whole soulmate thing. Ok, mostly I just like Jez. And the three vampire sisters and Ash.

Meyer is very wish fulfillment! One of the things that I did like about Edward and Bella was that they actually talked to each other, but sadly, most of that was lost amongst the "My love and my life!"

[penmage.livejournal.com]

This book annoyed the hell out of me. All the "no I love YOU more, shmoopy" "No, sweetums, I love YOU more" and Bella's insistence that she is plain and boring when no less than three guys (not counting the Hot Vampire) are falling all over themselves to ask her out - it was all just ridiculous.

And how about the "we're vampires keeping our secret under lock and key, but Edward has a crush, so let's not just tell her that we're vampires, but also our whole history."

Or the fact that she wants to be a vampire, but can't stand the sight of blood? Or the fact that she wants to be a vampire so she can live with him forever, but shies away when he brings up marriage?

There is just so much.

Have you read Vivian Vande Velde's Companions of the Night?

[oyceter]

OMG! Bella not noticing she was hot drove me crazy. Particularly after Meyer's loving descriptions of her gorgeous pale skin.

Ditto with the wanting to be converted to a vampire thing for a guy she has only known for a few months.

I think I've heard some people mention the Velde before, but I've never read it.

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

I thought it was pretty hilarious, but sadly not intentionally. (Sparkly vampires!) I enjoyed the read, but didn't bother with the sequel.

By far my favorite character was Alice. If the whole book had been about the vampire family and Bella and Edward hadn't even been in it, I would have been much more into it.

[oyceter]

I tried not to giggle too much, since my sister was there and I felt bad making fun of it. But, um, yes. Sparkly vampires!

I liked Alice a lot too. I think the book would have been ten times more interesting had it been about Alice and her secret past.

[sarahtales.livejournal.com]

I could not BELIEVE that I was being asked to accept sparkly vampires with not a hint of humour. Sparkly vampires! They should be hysterical, I feel so wronged.

I also feel like the vampire subgenre needs to take a different turn. Hot vampires are all well and good, but I am sick to the teeth of them.

That said, OMG you also read LJ Smith? I was seventeen, and terribly terribly obsessed. I had a little fan website with reviews. It was so lame.

Apparently in the sequel, Edward makes Bella a mix tape about their great love. Won't be reading that one.

[oyceter]

YES! Sparkly!

I am really sick of preternaturally beautiful and graceful vampires as well. Particularly those with metallic hair and gemstone eyes.

OMG! You read LJ Smith too! Awesome! I am getting such a kick out of old LJ Smith fans coming out in the comments. I was so obsessed in high school. I even wrote Forbidden Game future!fic resurrecting Julian that I never finished. I actually never read all her older series, like the Secret Circle, b/c I couldn't find all of them in the library, but I loooved Night World (reincarnation! blue fire! black flowers! wasn't that big a fan of the soulmate thing though).

[buymeaclue.livejournal.com]

Ah, Twilight. I hated it.

http://buymeaclue.livejournal.com/236565.html

SHE FAINTS AT THE SIGHT OF BLOOD.

Gawd.

[kate_nepveu]

If I'm ever a vampire, I'm just going to be civil and quiet and polite. That's how you keep a low profile, kids.

Somehow this sounds familiar . . .

I particularly like your quote of "slender, but soft somehow", as a particularly egregious example of a standard genre romance novel description ("slim curves," etc.). It's the "somehow" that does it.

[ponygirl2000.livejournal.com]

Ah Twilight! This book probably qualifies as uber-cracktastic for me because I thought it was crap in every possible way, yet couldn't put it down and raced through it all the while thinking it was crap. Maybe it was because the whole time I could very clearly see myself reading this at 13 over and over - and hopefully noticing it was crap. It has every teen girl hook possible short of a mystical horse joining in - but Meyer's still writing more books, give her time. This thing should come with a warning label.

I even read the second book - I didn't want to! but a friend as revenge for loaning her Twilight gave it to me - and it's even worse, with yet another supernatural guy in love with Bella and her passivity taken to such an extreme that she spends a fair amount of the book asleep. Burn these books! Scatter the ashes lest they rise and devour our souls!

[oyceter]

I even read the second book - I didn't want to! but a friend as revenge for loaning her Twilight gave it to me - and it's even worse, with yet another supernatural guy in love with Bella and her passivity taken to such an extreme that she spends a fair amount of the book asleep.

No way! I think I will definitely skip the second; I've heard it has even more mystical Native Americans in it.

This book is utterly cracktastic, but unfortunately, it doesn't hit any of my good crack buttons.

(I am still not over the sparkly.)

[rushthatspeaks.livejournal.com]

I desperately loved-- and still love-- L.J. Smith.

Nevertheless, I will not be reading this book, although I wish someone would do shoujo-manga style art of the sparkly vampires.

[oyceter]

You are a fellow LJ Smith fan! Now I'm sad I didn't know this last year because I would have inflicted a ton of reminiscing on you.

But yeah. I am for actual illustrations of sparkly vampires, but not necessarily reading about them.

[shewhohashope.livejournal.com]

I guess it's time to come out of the closet, I was once an LJ Smith fan.

Mainly Night World, but I also read the Circle books, and a few of the Vampire diaries. By that time I'd grown enough to hate Elena and think that Stephen was an idiot.

I was fascinated by the combinations of hair/eye colours because she never seemed to run out! You'd think there'd be more than one person in a series of books with brown eyes and brown hair, but I'm pretty sure that statistically blonde hair and violet eyes was the most common combination. Of course that made it even stranger that every single one of them was so freakishly pale. Where's the creativity with skin-tone, Smith?

I'm trying to figure out what the appeal was, because it was pretty rare for me to find any of the male leads attractive. I loved Mary-Lynette, and Jez, and that one girl who wasn't impossibly gorgeous, even though she was 'plain' in the most obnoxious way.

I re-read it a few years back it's even more shameful than I'd thought at the time.

[oyceter]

Another LJ Smith fan! Awesome!!

I loved Night World the best, though I am also secretly fond of Forbidden Game, even though it totally had the wrong ending. I read the last book of Vampire Diaries first, so I was ok with it, but when I finally got around to reading the first few, I came to the same conclusions about Elena and Stephen that you did.

But yes to adoring Mary-Lynette and Jez! And I was more in love with bad boys then, so I completely fell for Ash and Mor... I forgot his name.

[evil-kat.livejournal.com]

There must be something appealing about vapid 17 yo girls. Perhaps these vampires have spent the majority of their first several hundred years chilling out with mature, intellegent women, discussing philosophy, theology, and the problems of immortality. (And sparklology?)

And, reaching 450, they have a midlife crisis, buy a corvette, and cruise the high schools.

[oyceter]

And, reaching 450, they have a midlife crisis, buy a corvette, and cruise the high schools.

That is so awesome. I love the idea of high school girls as vampire mid-life crises.

[keilexandra]

My school friends rec'd this book (very strongly) to me, so I read it without any reservations and expected an easy YA romance. I loved it; NEW MOON made me cry and gave me a tight, painful feeling, even as my brain recognized how cliche it was. Hey, maybe my tolerance for YA hasn't been completely destroyed. [Link is f-locked; don't remember if you still read springgreen]

Most reviews I've since read online are negative, so I'm glad that I wasn't prejudiced by that going in.

[oyceter]

I read it without any reservations and expected an easy YA romance.

Hey, that is good too ^_^. I suspect I would have liked it more had it not been about vampires and had I not read it now, as opposed to before -- also, not commenting on your age! Commenting more on the insane amounts of vampire books I have read. Like, seriously. I think the only reason I wasn't a full-blown loligoth kid was because a) I didn't know such thing existed and b) I was too wimpy to stand out that much in a class of 20 people.

[(Anonymous)]

I really liked the book. And i really didn't find the sparkling hilarious, i didn't even think about it that way. Both me and my friends and classmates really enjoyed her books.

[oyceter]

Cool, I'm glad you guys did.