(no subject)

[oyceter]

I tend to get very nostalgic doing the software, since a lot of ours is from the nineties, being used and all. And I always look at them and think back to those years, when I was in high school and remember our first computer, the first time I printed out a paper instead of handwriting, my first exposure to the internet. And then I remember high school. And it's so strange, because it's so distant in my memory, and yet, I also remember how in the moment I was during the time. Somehow, it makes me sad that I can't really remember being in high school anymore. I remember events and certain images, but I don't completely recall what it was like anymore, I don't really remember how tight my class was. And it kind of hurts because I do remember around junior or senior year just being so sad that we were going to graduate and most likely never be that close again. Of course, that's how it happened. It's kind of scary, how nothing is quite real except in memory, and my memory is such a fallible thing. I can't quite tell what's worse, remembering clearly what it was like and hurting because it's not like that now, or not remembering as clearly and hurting because I feel like I've somehow lost it. Same with the memory of living at home. I got very homesick today for some reason. Maybe it's because it's my first Christmas not with my family, or that my time in Taiwan was particularly short this summer. Or just the realization that I'm not going to be able to spend that much time at home anymore. *sigh*