(no subject)

The time between vacation and back-to-work, between people visiting and not is very odd -- particularly when the people visiting are my family or friends from high school. Actually, even visits from people from college are odd now.

It's strange because I revert to old patterns of behavior from years ago, and the people visiting expect me to be a person much more like I used to be, or something. Expectations are different, the environment is different. Things that I'd normally say now I'd avoid. Things that I'd normally avoid I'd joke about. Or something.

I can sort of feel myself melting around the edges a bit and reforming to me-in-CA-who-works, as opposed to me-the-big-sister or me-the-older-daughter. It's odd feeling it happen. On the other hand, it's not to say that people push me into those roles; it's just that habit formed by years and years is difficult to break. And I do find that I can carry parts of me-who-works into my other relationships, and vice versa.

Context is weird.