>I probably screwed up my one chance at getting a job<
It wasn't. Really, it wasn't your one chance.
I hate job-hunting for exactly the same reasons you do; I want to just up and say to them, "Listen. I don't know if I'm the super-best person for the job. I can't work wonders. But I would try hard and I'm usually pretty decent at picking things up, so you really could do worse."
>Everyone (the boy, my parents, career advisor lady) is pushing for me to find a Real Job<
When I was looking for a Real Job the first time, I was still living at home after grad school, and it got bad because my mom was home all the time and inquiring into progress and we were constantly snippy with each other because I felt like she was nagging and she felt like she was just expressing interest and concern and it was all very bad. When I went on the job market again a few years later, I basically sat my parents down and said, "So here's the thing. I will tell you of any positive progress, but other than that, I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't *ask*, because it just makes me nervous and I'm stressed already." It helped that I wasn't living with them at that point, but they did get the hint and let me relay information to them instead of pestering me for it. I don't know if it's an option with your parents and your boyfriend, but maybe you can sit them down and do something similiar. "Listen, I will keep you updated if something happens, but please let me be the one to bring the topic up, because it's freaking me out a bit."
>I can't tell anymore if it's worth doing this, instead of just staying at the bookstore and being less confused. Everyone (the boy, my parents, career advisor lady) is pushing for me to find a Real Job, and I can't even tell what I think about it anymore<
:hugs again: Maybe one way to look at it is that you do have a job already. It pays money, it keeps you busy, you work at it; ergo, you have a Real Job. (Maybe it's that a lot of my friends are liberal-arts type people, but I know relatively few people who really have *careers.* Most of us seem to fall into jobs that didn't necessarily have a lot to do with what we majored in in college, and end up in pretty unexpected employment places.)
Now maybe you want to find a *different* job, because this one doesn't offer benefits or opportunities for advancement or it doesn't pay enough or whatever, but you do have a job already. And it might be helpful to go into interviews with that in mind, with the knowledge that (a) you were hired there, so you've got proof that you're employable (b) you've been a good employee there, and you're likely to be a good employee elsewhere (I mean, are you going to rob from the company? Are you going to give your boss and your fellow employees attitude problems? Are you going to quit after a week at the company, skipping out after you get your first paycheck and leaving the project that was due that day unfinished? I suspect not. So, congratulations! You'd be better than some people I've worked with at one place or another, and they managed to get past hiring managers, which means so can you.) and (c) You do have a job, so you're pulling in money. Staying at the bookstore is an option. Just, it's one of many.
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Fri, Aug. 27th, 2004 07:13 am (UTC)>I probably screwed up my one chance at getting a job<
It wasn't. Really, it wasn't your one chance.
I hate job-hunting for exactly the same reasons you do; I want to just up and say to them, "Listen. I don't know if I'm the super-best person for the job. I can't work wonders. But I would try hard and I'm usually pretty decent at picking things up, so you really could do worse."
>Everyone (the boy, my parents, career advisor lady) is pushing for me to find a Real Job<
When I was looking for a Real Job the first time, I was still living at home after grad school, and it got bad because my mom was home all the time and inquiring into progress and we were constantly snippy with each other because I felt like she was nagging and she felt like she was just expressing interest and concern and it was all very bad. When I went on the job market again a few years later, I basically sat my parents down and said, "So here's the thing. I will tell you of any positive progress, but other than that, I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't *ask*, because it just makes me nervous and I'm stressed already." It helped that I wasn't living with them at that point, but they did get the hint and let me relay information to them instead of pestering me for it. I don't know if it's an option with your parents and your boyfriend, but maybe you can sit them down and do something similiar. "Listen, I will keep you updated if something happens, but please let me be the one to bring the topic up, because it's freaking me out a bit."
>I can't tell anymore if it's worth doing this, instead of just staying at the bookstore and being less confused. Everyone (the boy, my parents, career advisor lady) is pushing for me to find a Real Job, and I can't even tell what I think about it anymore<
:hugs again: Maybe one way to look at it is that you do have a job already. It pays money, it keeps you busy, you work at it; ergo, you have a Real Job.
(Maybe it's that a lot of my friends are liberal-arts type people, but I know relatively few people who really have *careers.* Most of us seem to fall into jobs that didn't necessarily have a lot to do with what we majored in in college, and end up in pretty unexpected employment places.)
Now maybe you want to find a *different* job, because this one doesn't offer benefits or opportunities for advancement or it doesn't pay enough or whatever, but you do have a job already. And it might be helpful to go into interviews with that in mind, with the knowledge that (a) you were hired there, so you've got proof that you're employable (b) you've been a good employee there, and you're likely to be a good employee elsewhere (I mean, are you going to rob from the company? Are you going to give your boss and your fellow employees attitude problems? Are you going to quit after a week at the company, skipping out after you get your first paycheck and leaving the project that was due that day unfinished? I suspect not. So, congratulations! You'd be better than some people I've worked with at one place or another, and they managed to get past hiring managers, which means so can you.) and (c) You do have a job, so you're pulling in money. Staying at the bookstore is an option. Just, it's one of many.